diary of male escort Lexx Soule: Questionable Kinks: The Sadist & The Masochist (Part 3)
Conclusion
I personally identify as a switch. I like to be a top sadist, and I like to be a bottom masochist. Though my masochist kinks will stay in my private life and are not things I would let just anyone do. You may find it strange that I know I have a masochist side without an overtly large experience in being a masochist, but I’ve just done some things to know what I like and what I don’t and why I like what I like. I have experimented with my top side more and enjoy that dynamic. Two things that must be emphasised if you are going to be a top is learning the importance of your own boundaries and aftercare. You do not need to do everything, and you are allowed to decline certain acts should you not feel comfortable. Aftercare is about you and the other person. Whether that is cleaning your subordinate, showering with them, cuddling, body tickles and affection, bringing your masochist back to the safe space of reality and letting them know that they are now safe. Even in the days proceeding, check in to make sure they are okay mentally and physically. Take the time to bring yourself back to reality; meditate, watch a movie, stretch, hydrate, workout, eat some good food; do whatever you enjoy to bring you back to a level head. Should you be experienced within this realm you may not need a lot of time if any to bring yourself back to reality; you may just need a shower or bath by yourself to feel grounded. You understand yourself and the situation enough to know that it was all just fun.
Now while I have openly disclosed the fact that sexually I identify as a switch for this kink I do not always recommend everyone else publicly do the same thing. People will judge you, they will make remarks, and yes some people will be curious and ask enthusiastic questions, but may also have a big mouth and share your new experimentation with the entire floor that you work on. This may sound obvious, but if you do extensive research and learn more about this world you may want to openly share it with your world, which is not always the best. I am a sex worker and so the conversation of kink is very easy and comfortable for me, people already judge me because I am an escort. While I am about bringing a positive change to the conversation of sex, it needs to be done in a smart way. People will tell you that you should just openly express your sexuality and your kinky desires, you’ll turn around and say, “I want 10 people to piss in my mouth while my hands are tied behind my back” and all of a sudden no one wants to be your friend anymore. Sometimes sex needs to be kept subdue and private.
Hopefully this has been educational to any new comers or people who have never researched into kinks. Should this have installed curiosity, do extensive research, find out what you like and don’t like and have some fun. Enjoy the new world that is opened to you! Always remember to take things slow, moving to fast in the area of kink can do damage to everyone involved including yourself, always be clear with your communication, set boundaries, respect yourself and respect the person you are having fun with.
Below is a link to a YouTube kink educator that started me on the journey. Very friendly normal looking dude, welcoming to all, and a great entry level to kink.
https://www.youtube.com/@DepravedASMR
Should you want to find a community FetLife is a great place to find other kinksters, going to events is a great place to explore as well. Should you not like communities for any range of reasons, I do offer a selected range of kink services for your own private pleasure. From spiced vanilla to extreme. Just send me an email outlining what it is you desire, and I will let you know if I can bring that fantasy to life.
Email: lexxsoule@gmail.com
Stay safe. Stay sane. Stay Consensual.
Thank you for reading,
L. Soule.
