escort diary® of Zoe Sophia

Episode 8 - ORGASM: Our life-force energy

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Hey there Reader,

Thanks for dropping by for another instalment of my blog.

This one I wrote back in September of this year.

ORGASMS are our life-force energy.

Yep! Orgasms inspire me often. They spark my creativity, which is congruent with the Chakra System, the sex centre and our creativity both sit in the second chakra, the Sacral Chakra.

I’m still learning to have a g-spot only orgasm whilst in the missionary position.

During my very first sexual experience (and a few times after that) with another person I was able to experience this wonderful orgasmic pleasure with ease, but since a traumatic experience with my step-father I haven’t been able to.

Anyway, I digress. That’s another story.

Finally, I’ve been able to experience these again with my Partner this year.

I was building up to orgasm multiple times and then it happened. I can still feel it in my body now as I think about it a week later. The utter surrender, whole body shaking & absolute sweetness that is orgasm.

In my past I wouldn’t usually make much sound when experiencing an orgasm, but I’ve been consciously exploring this over the last year.

This time the noise that came from my throat was a howl and what came with it was a deep sadness. As I howled I felt myself start to cry. Instead of holding back, I allowed the emotion and sound to flow.

This sadness was for all the times I had not allowed myself to naturally express my emotions and feelings. Sadness for all the times I rejected myself and made myself small. The mask of the ‘nice girl’ has been slowly falling away during my Saturn return, this was just another layer.

At this point my Partner had moved to kneeling at my feet and allowed me to be however I needed to be. I am so thankful to be with a man that can hold this space for me.

As I was in my feminine flow, I began to move into my 'wild woman'. I was growling, spitting on myself and cackling in fits of laughter. I was allowing myself to be the messy, grotesque, the free expression of ME. The me I have been repressing for most of my life.

You see, I learnt that to receive love, I had be the ‘nice girl’. I had to act in a way that wasn’t taking up too much space, to repress the messy emotions, to look a certain pleasing way, not be too loud and to always be pleasant with a smile on my face. Whilst some of these traits on their own aren’t damaging, when they are all put together and used to manipulate, function in life and control myself, they become a mask. This mask is used as a way to shield myself from fully being seen as the dynamic woman I am because I learnt that wasn’t an acceptable way of being. Ultimately, I just wanted to fit in, so I made sure I would.

This was mirrored to me by family members, but also by society. This is how a woman should act to be acceptable and accepted in the world.

Now I’m learning that this mask is no longer serving me. It did for some time, but now it’s just a hinderance to my power that is waiting to be birthed.

Everything in my life at the moment is calling me into more authenticity than I have ever shown. My friends and the people around me are demanding it and so is my soul.

I’m declaring that I will no longer hide parts of myself for the comfort, love and attention of others. I will be 100% me and those that love me as a whole are welcome in my life.

It was also a recognition that those who can’t handle everything I am, will inevitably fall out of my life and that’s okay. When we change to a different/higher vibration some people in our lives will no longer resonate with us, this is just a universal law.

I’m done with holding on to things that aren’t meant for me, I have learnt to surrender and trust in the divine order of life.

I’d also like to add that orgasm is a beautiful way to connect with our inner landscape and our life force energy (Eros). In this particular instance I didn’t have a specific intention for this day, but I always have the intention to connect with self and the other when engaging in physical intimacy. On this day, it just so happened to connect me deeper with myself.

Conscious connections, sexuality/sensuality, tantra, self discovery and alchemy are some of my highest values and passions in life. The highest value I hold is Service of others. I know on a soul level that I am here to make a difference. I’ve learnt that to be in service of others, I need to be in service of myself first and from there I will gain wisdom and inspire the people around me with how I live and what I share.

If these are also your values or you want to know more about my values, keep an eye on what I share in the near future.

I can feel some magic brewing in my womb.

I'd love to be able to support you through an orgasmic awakening. Men and women can both experience this power. The secret is to allow yourself to feel your emotions and not try to avoid them like we usually do this this western society.

I'm here for you if you'd like to explore your own power and potential.

With Love,
Zoe Sophia x

P.s. SYDNEY & CANBERRA TOURS COMING UP.....
Sydney: 25th - 29th November (2 bookings available)
Canberra: 30th Nov - 2nd Dec (2 bookings available)

Contact me to make a booking: 0413 311 291

xxx

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SCARLET BLUE.
INDEPENDENT ESCORTS AUSTRALIA
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