escort diary® of Scarlett Grace

From Baby Sitter to Hooker

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Three years ago this month, I became a hooker-and joining the sex industry has been nothing short of a full blown head fuck, but I'm so happy i did.

Three years ago in early February; I left a man who I had been dating for three years, dropped out of uni and became a prostitute. The relationship I was in was sexless, I was 50 kilos heavier and chowing down high doses of anti-depressants (and doughnuts). I wasn't happy. I had lost my sense of identity within the relationship and for three years i truly believed that i had lost that sexual side of me. It wasn't because the person i was with was so awful, they're really quite the opposite; we just really were not right for one another. But he was safe and kind, so for three years we tried our best to make each other happy (And kudos to him, because i was a handful). Once we broke up, my wild side had come back in full swing! I went on a bit of a dick bender, hitting up Tinder and every other crappy dating site to exercise the slutty part of myself that had been kept in a mason jar under the kitchen sink for the last three years. It was during this time that i decided to do a Google search on prostitution in Melbourne. I can't really tell you why exactly the thought occurred to me, or why the idea of me doing it didn't make me wince with disgust or judgement; I was just curious, and i gave myself full permission to follow my curiosities.

I began my hooking escapades at a little brothel in Collingwood a month later, and a month after that i dropped out of my uni course where i had been studying early childhood education and development. Working with kids had always been something I'd enjoyed and I had had a big role in raising my two younger sisters, as well as working as a children's entertainer and baby sitter. I sadly feel as though my days with working with children are behind me purely because of the stigma surrounding my job. I feel as though people wont think I'm trust worthy, which is maddening, but i also kind of get it. Leaving uni was something i really wanted to do and I'm not sure if i regret it or not; but once i found the sex industry, it was like opening a door to a whole other world. For the first time in my life I felt as though i had found my people. It may sound bizarre; but the whole time i was in that relationship, going to uni in the pursuit of making my Mother happy, i felt like i was faking normal. But I'm not normal. I'm a weirdo, and so is my old man and all of my other favourite people in the world.

Hooking/whoring/escorting is the only job I've ever had that doesn't make me feel like blowing my fucking brains out. For the first time in my life I feel as though i have autonomy; complete and utter freedom to choose how I am going to spend my time and what that time is worth. And it feels pretty good.

I'm only 23, and so I understand that i don't really know anything (does anyone?) But i do know that life is suffering and that nature is brutally unkind to all of us at one time or another; so suffer for the things that you love and that feed your soul, not for the things that will win the approval of others but wont fulfil you. And for me at the moment, that's sucking dick for money.

I hope that if you aren't yet living a life that is authentically your own, that you find the courage to do so regardless of if others understand or approve of it.

Anyway, I hope you're well and that you're happy enough.

With Love,
Scar xxx

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SCARLET BLUE.
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