"Hey Babe" - Hey, Nope!
A Guide to Using Terms of Endearment in the Adult Industry according to Marci.
In my late teens through to my mid 20's I worked as a stripper. Before that time, I'd never really heard or used the term 'babe' aside from in the movies. My perception of the word was that it was an American colloquialism. It was over a decade ago after all.
The first time I was called 'babe' by another stripper, I was kind of startled. It took a little while to realise that it was used as a term of endearment between the girls. The context was one of friendliness and acceptance.
It kind of made me feel like a sexy gang member! When I tried using it on my friends from school, they found it pretty amusing to say the least.
Of course, these days 'babe' is the new 'mate' for girls in the everyday vocabulary of average Australians, and I embrace it.... In all circumstances bar one.
A pet hate of mine is an initial enquiry that omits my name and begins "Hey Babe"
When you don't know the person and are not standing face to face with them, AND are not a fellow sex worker. Then it tends to come across as both infantile and condescending as shit. Especially when it's a man addressing a fully grown woman.
Can you imagine a professional in any other industry happily answering a work related email from a new client that begins with "Hey Babe." ???
Nope. Although it could be an interesting social experiment to try that on my accountant.
Don’t get me wrong here, I understand that the sex industry is about… well…sex, and that expressions of affection do come into that. In context.
If I even know you well enough to be rough riding your cock, then I would say by that stage it’s ok to substitute my name for “babe/baby/my slut/good girl/goddess” or whatever else floats your boat. Because you’ve already passed screening and paid me for my services.
Now I feel safe and can rock your world with zero abandon. Now I can relax because you respected my professional booking process. Now you are a client, who I can enjoy as a fellow human being and not some random-might-be-timewaster-or-pyscho who texts me and 20 other escorts at the same time the ambiguous poetry; “Hey Babe, avail now?”
Not all my escort friends agree with me on this one.
“They just don’t know any better,” is something I hear a lot of.
Personally, I would argue that not educating clientele on this issue is allowing men to unwittingly view women as interchangeable empty vessels. It’s also just one more thing holding the sex industry back from being recognised as legitimate.
Sex work is work. Sex workers are professionals. Treat us accordingly. Then we can get on with the fun part.
In summary, for those who might be reading this article without knowing me as a person or as a sex worker, please read a few of my reviews. I love my clients and any of them will tell you that I can be as wild as it gets when there is a foundation of mutual respect. Submissive role play is one of my favourite things to do in the bedroom. Being bound, gagged and fucked stupid whilst being referred to as an obedient whore is incredibly liberating for me. So I wouldn’t exactly say I’m uptight!
But send me an anonymous “Babe” text and you are immediately putting yourself on the NO pile for me. I am an individual. I am a grown woman. I run my own business.
So you can call me Marcella or Marci, and let me know your name too. Then we’re two adults planning an excellent experience together. Then I’ll be your Babe.