escort diary® of Jade Rose

What NOT to do with or to an escort!

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Hello Gentlemen...

Now, I know that my personal preferences may differ to others, but I thought I might write a handy list of a few things that most escorts will dread re-booking you over...

So in the future, if you decide to book an escort, try and avoid the following:

Outside of the bedroom:

1. No shows and last minute cancellations. Now I know this may seem like a bit of a whinge... But you know how annoying it is when someone you had booked in doesn't turn up right? Like that time you booked a tradesman to fix that leak and you were left for days wondering when they were going to turn up, if ever... Or the time the property manager assured you that they would be there for your rental inspection, so you took the time off work and waited, and waited, and waited, and received no apology email or call the next day... Well, it's the same with escorts. If you book a specific time slot, we are then unable to give that time slot to another client. If you decide not to go ahead with the booking, at least let the lady know ahead of time. Just not showing up is plain rude.

2. Writing, or threatening to write, a bad review with no good reason to. This is so obviously a reason for an escort not to have you back. Word of mouth and online advertising is how an escort makes her money. If the lady provides you with a good service and you sit behind your keyboard and write a terrible review, chances are you just cost that woman a lot of money in future bookings, and got yourself a prime position on her "do not contact" list. Be kind to your escort, she is there to please you, the least you can do if you want to write her a review, is to write an honest one.

3. Assuming escorts are sex robots. Escorts are people too, we eat, sleep, and have a social life outside of sex work. Please don't message an escort at 3:39am on a Wednesday morning for a booking in half an hours time and expect a friendly response, if any response at all. Prior bookings are key! And while sometimes escorts may be available at short notice, please don't assume we are ladies who just sit around in hotel rooms all day, showered, shaved, makeup done, waiting for your call. We are busy professional women, who also enjoy some down time, just like anyone else.

4. Thinking that going over the booked time by "only 15 minutes" or "just another 5 minutes" or "just a quick chat" is always okay. Yes, while we may enjoy your company, and if we don't have anywhere to be, we may like to stay for a chat or a coffee afterwards. But, as mentioned earlier, escorts are busy professional women. Our time is our income, and spending "just another 10 minutes" with every client, can end up costing us a lot of money over time.

5. Asking questions that are clearly crossing boundaries. "What's your real name?", "Where do you live?", "Where did you go to school?", "Will you add me on Facebook?" NO! Escorts use working names as a means to protect their privacy, and that privacy needs to be respected at all times. If an escort chooses to share some aspects of her life with you then you need to consider that a privilege and not a right.

In the bedroom:

1. Don't just assume you can twist an escort's nipples. I'm not saying there aren't some women who like nipple-twisting, but that's definitely an "ask first" situation. Otherwise it just seems like you think the lady has oven nobs and you're not sure what temperature they should preheat her to.

2. Please! Don't Ignore foreplay altogether! Please! The idea that foreplay is just something you do when you're lying in a bed at a beachfront appartment with rose petals lining the bed is total bullsh*t!. Foreplay should happen every time. It's paramount to enjoyment later on...

3. Don't, and I mean DO NOT initiate some kinky stuff without asking first. It can be super-scary when a guy tries being dominant or aggressive in bed when the escort hasen't expressly said, "Pin my hands behind my head" before he did it. Not asking before doing these potentially super-terrifying things is so stupid it hurts.

4. Now come on, this one is just plain and simple right? Don't Whine about using a condom, just don't do it. Gentlemen, you're not 13 years old, you know you are seeing a sex professional who values both her own health and yours. You've completed several years of schooling (and maybe even university) and you know about the risks for STIs and pregnancy. Get over the fact that it "just feels better without it."

5. Now, this one is completely obvious, and yet, needs to be said. Please don't knead and escort's boobs like dough. I swear guys who do this have never touched boobs before in their life because if you had, surely some woman has said, "Ow, what the hell?" when you did that, right? Boobs are attached to our bodies! You can't take them with you when you go!

6. LUBE!! Oh goodness me! Lube! Please don't forget that yes, we do keep lube handy. And yes, we do use it. Like, for example, in those situations, when a guy forgot foreplay because he didn't think it mattered, or when a guy just wants to have a quickie. It's just a good thing to have. And just FYI, it will make it feel better for both you and the escort!

7. FINGERING. Now, like I said earlier, I can't speak for every woman or every escort out there. But personally, I know I don't like to be fiercely punched in the vagina over and over again and then be asked "does that feel good?" NO! No it does not feel good! Fingering, while it may be embedded in men from a young age to be a pinnacle part of foreplay and/or sex, is an advanced sexual skill. Doing it right takes time and practice. Please don't treat my vagina like a punching bag and expect me to orgasm, it's just not going to happen.


Thank you for taking the time to read my diary entry, I hope you enjoyed the read and learned something new.

Hope to see you soon.

Jade Rose xxx

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