I couldn't reconcile this with my need for periods of movement, excitement, change, peace and need for solitude. Therefore I have dabbled in the field, and also dabbled in this one. Sometimes I'm envious of others with their reputations and regular employment - in both fields, but I don't think I could have lived life any differently. I'm 40 years old on November 27th and I approach it with dread (wrinklies, sagging, bad eyesight, too much experience maybe) but also with equanimity. I am more popular with my fan base in the US and am in greater demand now than I was at 23 when I started this work. I get to meet the most amazing co workers and gentlemen who appreciate my skills, my affectionate nature, my lack of pretension or pretense, my earthy sense of humour - and in truth I am little different with friends in the real world than I am with my lovely clients. I give what I can to those who need an ear to hear them, a laugh to brighten their day, physical contact and release, kindness and non judgement, advice, fun, experiment, experience and a nice rack :)
In return I am well paid, allowed to set my own schedule, see who I choose, travel to work wherever I wish, gain knowledge and insight from those who may not say their innermost thoughts to anyone else, eat in amazing restaurants, stay in amazing hotels and have fun.
Sometimes I'm sad I can't announce at a dinner party what my real passion for work is, but it's also this shadowy, secret other life that keeps me feeling fully alive and set apart from the humdrum and mundane lives that many others seem to live.
I may do this for another year or two, or like one lady I met a year ago still be going strong and getting booked solid at 60!! I don't know and at this stage I don't much care as I love my current life just as it is.
Wishing happiness to all of you x