In this post I wish to elaborate on a common misconception of my chosen paid hobby/profession.
I’ve almost been Escorting for 18 months.
While I make a tidy living off it, it's not quite what people expect. It's not what *I* expected, but I love my it to bits and wouldn't choose anything else for myself right now (unless it was something like paid holiday reviews of tropical islands or a taste tester for some fabulous ice cream company).
Why isn't it what I expected? I'm supposed to be a call girl, and the classic image of one is a woman who exchanges sex for money. Soon after I started, it became apparent that many of the men who were coming to see me weren't after sex, and most of them wanted to talk and just be held which caught me completely off-guard. When you're paying $3k a night, people expect more than sex.
To my dismay, sex only occurs in roughly 60% of my bookings. Even then it's often short and sweet, at his lead. I've got a healthy sex drive - it's not mad, but it's there. To have some handsome men paraded around in front of me in towels and then telling me I can't shag them even though I'm in their employ as a sex worker for the time being... Wa! It's a tough life ;) So many times I go to sleep with my toys in my panties because I can’t be relaxed any other way – he power bill is high!
Now as I become more known and popular, I usually have more potential bookings than I want or need, so I screen my clients for the best and most pleasant. I have a long list of who I won't put on my client list. This includes anyone in their early Twenties (they're terrible in bed, terrible to talk to-I do not have chemistry or can have an intellectual conversation), anyone who puts me off while I'm speaking to or corresponding with them, my rule of thumb is address me how you wish to be addressed back, respect and manners go both ways, and I think this is a huge factor as to why I have such lovely, pleasant and mutually satisfying experiences.
So, isn't sex the be-all and end-all of being a Sex Worker?
At the end of the day, no. Even in an 'exotic dancing' venue, where lap dances and table dances and the like are happening, I wouldn't say it's about sex. Not entirely. For the men who go in and put their money down for time with a girl, for whatever purpose, what he's paying for is her time.
That's not so much a polite euphemism as the bland truth.
Time, attention, affection perhaps, but mostly attention. The men I see are often lonely men or needing to fill a void in their life to which I am a perfect match for, I make them laugh and feel more alive just with my outgoing & bubbly personality. A pretty, healthy and cheerful young girl (in her lingerie and a smile) giving you a big warm hug and listening to your day, your problems and your thoughts - and taking advantage of a release or two before leaving after a few hours.
It can be emotionally taxing for many WL just for having to listen to such problems, luckily my counselling units I’ve partaken in at Uni really help me here as we can chat as you debrief for hours and even though I’m an empath and do actually care, I have the ability of offering advice while not condensing in others issues as to burst my own glittery bubble, which I know many ladies lack being able to not take things personally.
Many people in my life, they know what I do for a living. I'm comfortable with it and answer casually. It sets some people on the back foot. It intrigues some. Some gush forward with questions, which can be really annoying as even though I may answer according to my own experiences, this does not determine how the next girl in the game will experience this life.
The people you have to watch out for, the ones who will make trouble and treat you badly are the ones who immediately start telling you how great they think it is and how empowered I must be - immediately going after all the shiny things and vocalizing them. Watch out for those ones, they're full of crap.
At least with people who give you the evil eye straight up let you know where you stand.
How'd I get into this line of work? A progression from modelling to Burlesque performances worldwide to being an escort. Why am I a provider in the adult industry? I still feel admired and wanted (I love male attention!) It yields great amounts of cash in little time. While those windfalls are large, they're infrequent and unpredictable. Due to an injury hiccup, I'm not as reliable as I’d wish. I can't work a 40+ hour week, I need lots of recovery time after hanging out with friends. One client every now and then is fine, and I can see them on my own grounds at my leisure. That brings in rent money and I'm free to be a sleepy, off-beat recluse the rest of the time. Not being a recluse sends my stress levels through the roof and triggers more hiccups requiring more time off. It's all about consistency, prevention and taking care of my own body and brain. Feeding it all these endorphins at work is a pretty neat fringe benefit :)
That should cover it all, thanks for reading.